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Friday, June 24, 2005

JohnHuang2 on Gitmo

Durbin says 'Sorry if I hurt your feelings, but...'

If you're on a diet plan -- let's say you want to drop 30 pounds, slim your legs, hips and thighs, or firm up that flabby tush, then stay away from Bush's gulags. At Guantanamo -- despite being the most scrutinized, probed, investigated and re-investigated gulag in history -- the typical gulagee puts on about 13 pounds. Armed with this knowledge, Democrat honchette Donna Brazile describes Gitmo as a place Bush and his neocon fiends "set up and designed" to "torture" people and barbarically "get information out of them." The only choice the detainee gets is the method of torture: Which will it be, honey-glazed chicken or lemon-baked fish? If that doesn't break them, side orders of steamed vegetables or rice pilaf will do the trick. (With a coupon, inmates get an extra Lunch Special or Dinner Combo.)


Last week, one nutcase compared American soldiers at Gitmo to "Nazis, Soviets in their gulags, or some mad regime -- Pol Pot or others -- that had no concern for human beings." Now, if I didn't tell you this nutcase is the No. 2 Democrat in the Senate describing what Americans had "done to" prisoners in their control, you would most certainly believe this must have been said by IslamoNazis, Zarqawi in Iraq, or some madman -- Howard Dean or others -- who had no concern for U.S. soldiers. Sadly, that is not the case. Sen. Dick Durbin read an e-mail from an FBI agent complaining to higher-ups that Americans were 'abusing' the 20th hijacker, and several others. The 'abuse' included being forced to hear Christina Aguilera's music while chained to the floor (which is torture when you want to dance) and being held in an air-conditioned cell with the thermostat set way down during bitter, subzero weather the tropics are known for.


It's no way to treat a hijacker.


The FBI memo described in graphic detail how one suspected suicide bomber kept "pulling his hair out." The whole thing was enough to make him want to kill himself.


So, according to Durbin's insightful analysis (pre-"apology"), being forced to hear loud rap music in a chilly cell is as deadly as Hitler's death camps and Stalin's gulags (though probably not as deadly as riding around with Teddy Kennedy). Who could forget the Soviets' brutal network of rap music gulags, how funky vocals and drum loops blaring from boomboxes wiped out 30 million people? In Cambodia, 1.7 million perished from Pol Pot's hip-hop solo album. Even today, millions are haunted by memories of Stalin's fierce gangsta rappers.


Facing a growing firestorm, Durbin, his eyes tearing up and voice choking with emotion at a new Gallup poll showing 58% support keeping Gitmo open, now says he didn't really mean it. Or that he did, but he apologizes to "some who may believe" his "remarks crossed the line." He doesn't. Senators immediately rose in Durbin's defense, saying, in effect, who among us hasn't, from time to time, said something one ends up regretting. No biggie. Yes, who among hasn't leapt to compare Guantanamo to Auschwitz, crematoriums, gas chambers, genocide and the Holocaust. Bush. Hitler. Stalin. Thirty million people killed in gulags, 30 million chicken wings served at Gitmo -- the "historical parallels" are chilling!


No one has died at Guantanamo, but! Try to put yourself in the shoes of the 20th hijacker. On Fox News Sunday, Juan Williams, overcome with emotion, said that if you're laying on your back, "and someone has you chained hand and foot, and someone is putting so much pressure on you, hot and cold, jumping up and down" -- but that was probably some sick porno flick he saw.


Guantanamo inmates get free health care, free meals, free shelter -- so liberals have found the first socialist system they don't like. And the only one that works. It has the trappings of theocracy, though, as gulagees get prayer beads, oil and their very own personally delivered copy of the Koran, free of infidel germs, as infidel guards must do everything short of donning full-body space suits before handling the Koran. Five times a day, prayer calls are broadcast over the gulag's loudspeakers. Some of the inmates, eager to show their gratitude, toss urine and feces at the guards and head-butt them, according to former Gitmo military Chaplain, Kent Svendsen, interviewed on The O'Reilly Factor Monday.


Over at the liberals' Fair and Balanced alternative to Fox News, Al Jazeera, Durbin's original Gitmo=Nazi death camps remarks were picked up instantly, though that was easy because the boys at Al Jazeera got a copy of Zarqawi's speech before Durbin reached the Senate floor to deliver it. Libbies insist it's things like Gitmo which really ticks al-Qaeda off -- they would be working as nurses, teachers and policemen if not for Gitmo -- so it's nice to know libbies go out of their way to craft their words so carefully. Wouldn't wanna give the enemy fodder.


Liberals say Gitmo has tarnished America's image. Al Jazeera airs liberals saying Gitmo has tarnished America's image. The Arab press then cites liberals as proof Gitmo has tarnished America's image; liberals then quote the Arab press as evidence they were right all along -- Gitmo has tarnished America's image. So, if America has an 'image problem' in the Arab world, clearly it's all Bush's fault.


CNN, showing it's on top of things, was all over the Durbin story for about . . . 3 seconds. Then it was back to playing the 450,000th re-run of the Downing Street Memo bombshell(!!!), which is a story, based on a media story, about memos, based on hearsay memos, which don't exist because the "reporter" says he destroyed the original memos in order to "protect" his "source" (AP version), or the originals still exist but he returned them to the source after making copies (other version of story). Boy, this'll seal Bush's fate! Impeachment here we come!


And just when you thought the liberal media was out of control, the New York Times paused long enough from its coverage of Tom DeLay's golfing habits to delve into . . . the Downing Street Memo, and how much trouble Bush's in because their "poll" shows Bush's approval rate about where it was last November. And we know how that turned out.


MSNBC, trying to set itself apart from the competition, seized on the issue of the . . . Downing Street Memo. As did USA Today. And the L.A. Times. And the Chicago Tribune.


Libbies still complain the media are ignoring the Downing Street Memo and covering up for Bush. Now, if Karl Rove can 'fix' every Diebold, then he can hack every media computer, which explains all the fawning media coverage Bush is getting.


Gore compares Republicans to Nazis. Sen. Byrd likens Republicans to Nazis. Janeane Garofalo says Republicans are Nazis. Julian Bond calls Republicans the Taliban. I was so glad to hear them say that, 'cause it all blew up in their faces. Cornered, frustrated, beaten at the polls, it was only a matter of time when toiletscum like Durbin would start comparing Americans in uniform to the Gestapo. Calling a Republican a Nazi can be hilarious, given the background of many Democrats. But calling our servicemen and women Nazis isn't. If it isn't treason, it should be. Durbin stood on the Senate floor and slandered every man and woman in uniform. And his country. I say throw the bum out of the Senate. And if Democrats are so worried about inmates at Gitmo, I say let these inmates go for a ride with Teddy Kennedy. They'll be safe with him.

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