Les Risiblés

The incredible Iowahawk does it again. Read excerpts from his upcoming musical on the French riots.

ACT I

Split stage. On the right, a group of immigrant street toughs mill outside a bleak suburban banlieu. On the right: President Jacques Chirac’s office in Elysee Palace, where Chirac is toasting another French diplomatic victory with Prime Minister Dominique de Villepin (who is a man).

CHIRAC It’s great to be part of the UN… the EU’s a marvelous thing…

VILLEPIN In our little cloister the world is our oyster…

TOGETHER ‘cuz – we – get – to – pull – all - the - striiiiings!

CHIRAC We are FRANCE!

VILLEPIN We are France!

TOGETHER If you think you can beat us, bon chance!

CHIRAC We’re on a first name basis with the Chinese.

VILLEPIN Not to mention Kofi Annan on speed dial.

TOGETHER With speeches so emphatique and manuevers diplomatique, we’ll twist the rusty knife in while we smiiiile!

TOGETHER We are France, we are France!

CHIRACWe’ve got the Saudi contacts…

VILLEPINto get us oil contracts…

TOGETHERand stuff away the profits in our pants!

Music makes dramatic minor key shift, stage rotates to the immigrant boys.

KHALIDMy parents immigrated from Morocco.

TARIQMy dad arrived in Paris from Algiers.

HASSANNow all that we can do is hang out by the banlieu…

TOGETHERMom and Dad ain't found a job in 30 years!

KHALID (angrily)We are France!

HASSANWe are France!

TOGETHERWhere a guy can’t get the break he wants!

TARIQA hundred Euros weekly for our welfare.

KHALIDThey think that it will keep us satisfied.

TOGETHERThey invented mimes, and we’re accused of crimes? It's time for these two worlds to collide!

TOUGHS (angrily)We are France!

CHIRAC/VILLEPINWe are France!

TOUGHS We are France!

CHIRAC/VILLEPINWe are France!

The stage rotates as the two groups continue singing. Finally they bump into each other and begin catlike finger snapping.

CHIRAC/VILLEPINWhen you’re a Frog you’re a Frog all the way, from your first cigarette to your last beaujolais!

TOUGHSMohhhhh- OH! – rocco! Where the wind comes sweeping down the dunes! Where the sand can fly straight in your eye, but they don’t have these French buffoons!
Pantomime sissy knife fight

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