Thursday, December 04, 2014
We will not run for president.
Despite the pleas of many in the community and around the country, we have decided that we will not be a candidate for the Presidency in 2016.
In this we join Bud Norman who made the same pledge just the other day.
Being in desperate need of some some self-aggrandizing publicity ourselves, and lacking anything else to write about on a slow news day, we have decided to follow Portman's lead and announce that we are also not going to run for president. This will come as a bitter disappointment to the multitudes of Americans who have looked to us for hope in these dark times, and we cannot deny the alarming possibility that it might result in someone even worse winning the office, but we think it is for the best.