New Element Discovered!

ABC New Jake Tapper gives us number infinity of Joe Biden gaffes. The drive-by-media has always assured us that Joe is really, really smart. That he was chosen to be VP to provide the Obama administration with foreign policy expertise. We were also told that every time Biden opens his mouth and emits a gaffe, "that's just Joe" as if stupid statements or outright lies were verbal tics by an otherwise sage and wise statesman.

Well, here's the report by Tapper:

At an event at Union Station today where Vice President Joe Biden was heralding the $1.3 billion in investments in rebuilding train stations and passenger rails, a microphone picked up one of the former senator's myriad Senate colleagues addressing him, formally, as "Mr. Vice President."

That met with Vice President Biden's standard reply.

"Gimme a f*&$#ing break," he said, apparently unaware that the microphone was on.

Look, Tapper, we're not surprised by a moron being a moron. We're frankly surprised that you're commenting on it. Won't this get you in hot water with the other paid-for members of the Washington press corps?

On a more serious vein, this comment was worth repeating, proving that even the most useless posts are occasionally worth scrolling through.

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron , 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons , which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.
This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.