The Recent Muslim Contribution to Science and Technology.

From Powerline:

But let us not get lost in the mists of the distant past. The contemporary Muslim world has made its own contribution to civilization. It has given us the explosive vest. It has also given us the improvised explosive device. It has not ceased in its efforts to perfect the destructive power of these devices.

And to go along with these accomplishments it has given us new twists in the field of suicide bombing that have inflicted great damage on Muslims and infidels alike. Who needs NASA when you have this kind of material to work with?

Among those giving serious thought to NASA's mission in the age of Obama are Mona Charen and the editors of Investor's Business Daily. Only Sultan Knish, however, has revealed NASA's new plan for Muslims in outer space. Let those who would mock demonstrate their superficiality.

The NASA plan revealed by Sultan Knish comes in the form of a letter from NASA to President Obama. It includes five projects that will obviously do much to attract the Muslim world. Consider, for example, Project Two ("throw things on the Jews"):

While we have been making efforts to reach out to Muslim countries and engage them in purely peaceful space exploration, our preliminary finding is that their main interest in space is to get into space in order to, and I quote, "Throw Things Down on the Jews". And Muslim technological developments in rocketry and launch vehicles such as Saddam's Space Gun "Big Babylon" and Iran's nuclear weapons programs all have the common aim of "Throwing Things Down on the Jews".

We at NASA believe that the best way to interest Muslims in space is to convince them of its potential for "Throwing Things at the Jews", but in a way that benefits all of mankind, and doesn't lead to any loss of life. As you may possibly know (or would if you did something besides golf and spend money all day) Earth is at risk of one day being struck by an asteroid that could potentially wipe out all life on the planet.

Utilizing your brilliant suggestion that we "go land on an asteroid", we plan to send an automated vehicle to an asteroid and deposit an Israel flag on an asteroid that may one day hit Earth. We are confident that the Muslim world will immediately step up and join forces with us to develop long range weapons capable of hitting that asteroid. Particularly if we also leave a tape player on its surface blasting, "Hava Nagilla".

Not only will this provide Earth with a poorly aimed global defense network against falling rocks from the sky, but it will also hopefully prevent rockets from being fired at schools, instead of into space where they belong.

Then there's Project #4:

Project 4: Space Camel


The ability of camels to survive in a hostile environment is well known. Camels have survived deserts, Moroccan bazaars and owners who put them in beauty contests. Perhaps they can also survive the harsh rigors of space.


Because we no longer have a spacecraft (thanks for that by the way, because why would a space program need one of those anyway) and no way of getting one, we might as well try camels. Why camels? Because they meet both your major priorities, engaging the Muslim world, and using "Clean Energy". And there's nothing cleaner than a camel. At least nothing outside a cesspool or rotting sewage.


Our plan is simple. We're going to take a bunch of camels. Get very drunk. Stick the camels in a catapult, and scribble some arabic numerals in a notebook. Do some algebra, and invite Muslims to participate in this new wonderful race to space. Then we're going to let the camels fly.


Honestly we don't know where the camels will land. They might land in deserted areas. They might land on houses or people. They might land on the White House. They might land on the moon. We just don't know! That's because due to your budget cuts, we can no longer afford calculators. Instead we're going to have our Muslim colleagues do the math for us on an abacus. Their advanced knowledge of science will surely see us through.


And frankly if you're going to engage children with the wonders of space, nothing will do it half as well as a shrieking camel flying through the sky.

Sounds like part of the Obama plan.