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Showing posts with label trans-species. Show all posts
Showing posts with label trans-species. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 24, 2019

Babylon Bee: "Parents Allow 6-Year-Old Son To Begin Transitioning Into A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Per His Wishes"



"Yeah, I wanna be a ninja turtle," he said. "Pow! Bam! Bang!" He then started kicking his mother and stabbing her in the face with his plastic sai, confirming their suspicion that little Hayden was actually a ninja turtle trapped in a boy's body. Over the next three months, their boy underwent seven surgeries and strange glowy sewer ooze to help him begin his biological transition into a ninja turtle who punches things.

"It's important for parents to listen to their kids' every desire and immediately affirm that desire," Greg told reporters at a press conference held on their lawn. "If your kid says he's a fire truck, rip off his legs and install some industrial tires, for goodness' sake."

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Rachel Dolezal Is Just Another Person Driven Insane By Liberalism


Matt Walsh on Liberalism. Some excerpts. (read the whole thing)
Liberalism is a force of hopeless insanity.

It’s important to understand this upfront. Progressives have been waging a brutal, endless war against Truth, and this is where it leads. To Bruce Jenner. To Rachel Dolezal. To much worse things than these, like the destruction of unborn life and the annihilation of marriage and the family. This is liberalism. Why are you shocked by any absurdity or atrocity it creates when this same force has been eating our culture alive for decades?

Did you just now notice? ...

Liberals insist that biology, genetics, anatomy, and chemistry have nothing to do with gender, and that an individual can choose to defy all of these factors if their feelings run contrary to their physical reality. Therefore, why can’t a person identify as another race if that’s how they feel? Indeed, race is already a murky subject, and every person on Earth is some combination of various ethnicities. My whiteness is far less hardwired and far more difficult to define than my maleness, so if the latter is negotiable, certainly the former must be as well...

The term “transracial” started as a satire among conservatives, but has been unironically adopted by liberals. Now conservatives are left staring from the sidelines flabbergasted, saying, “Uh, guys? We were joking…” But it’s too late. Liberals, as they have demonstrated time and again, will not back away from the slippery slope. They’ll grab a sled and slide right down that thing. If you point out how one liberal proposition leads to an even more absurd proposition, they’ll happily defend the more absurd one. Maybe not right away — they have to act like it was their idea first– but eventually, that particular bit of morbid idiocy will be a matter of liberal dogma.

Rachel Dolezal is a pathological liar, so as more of her deceptions come to light, progressives will have no choice but to disown her. But she did “start a conversation” about transracialism — even “changing the way we think about race”, according to NPR — and I am confident that, sooner rather than later, the transracials will be standing alongside the transgenders and the trasableds and the transspecieds and the transdimensionals and the transrobots, all enjoying the status of protected and prized minority communities.

If you doubt such an eventuality, if you think liberalism will turn back once it sees the depths of its own dementia, you clearly do not understand what you’re dealing with.

Modern liberalism, so called, is nothing more and nothing less than the categorical rejection of truth. It is not scared or slowed or dissuaded by any form of untruth, because it is inherently, down to its very essence, in every fiber of its hideous being, a lie. It is an enemy of truth and an ally of anything that undermines it. I recently made the argument that the liberal transgender superstition completed the final step into total, full blown anti-truth lunacy. Once they have perverted the very definition of being, there is nowhere else to go. This is it. Whatever faint glimmer of reality still shone from its dying core has now been extinguished. That was my theory, and it took less than two weeks to be proven correct.

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Gay marriage and he Supremes


Things are moving so fast in Fantasy Land Liberal Culture that the upcoming Supreme Court blessing  of gay marriage is already past it's sell-by date already even before the judges declare their fidelity to crazy. The cutting edge of societal evolution is my right to marry my horse who is actually a trans-species differently-abled blue dragon ... as am I.

The perfect Democrat Ticket: Here It Is: #ClintonJennerDolezal2016

Thus, by the Power of Common Core, we humbly announce that three (3) is just a large value of two (2). We adjure you to vote for Clinton/Jenner/Dolezal in 2016, by write-in, if those odious, pedantic conservatives somehow infringe on your right to feel however you want about that age-old tool of patriarchal oppression, integers.
As the Really Hip Individual Currently Choosing to Retain a Male Sexual Identity Ezra Klein noted, the Constitution is, like, really old, or something. What better way to fight that Ancient Screed of Cisgender, Euro-Masculine Domination than to vote in a First Trimulierate in 2016? Progress is predicated upon the idea that anything conservatives esteem is on the target list for rhetorical saturation bombing. 


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Fail Burton comments:
Why are we not surprised a cult of race and gender which comes up with transgender also comes up with transnativeamericans and transblack? We have warned for years about the slippery slope and the reality of this cult outruns even our Onion-like sarcasm. That is almost by definition a culture of insanity. Anything is anything in this nutty world. Even we couldn't predict men posing as women would launch ideological attacks at the ideology which bore them and get a 40 yr. old lesbian music festival shut down and feminist plays canceled. Now just saying you're a women qualifies you for a female-only college. What nuttery will this cult come up with next? How crazy does our satire have to get to outrun the actual insanity of a thing which could produce Rachel Dolezal? These idiots have produced an actual transworld, and yes I am transphobic.

The Supreme Court's blessing of same-sex marriage is past it's sell-by date already even before the judges declare their fidelity to crazy.  The cutting edge of societal evolution is my right to marry my horse who is actually a trans-species differently-abled blue dragon, as am I.

Sunday, June 14, 2015

I am a trans-species individual.

In the comments to the interview with Jake Tapper (CNN), this brave new truth is revealed.

For years I have been keeping a personal secret that I now finally feel brave enough to reveal: I am a trans-species individual.

Since birth I have been categorized (by others) as a Capuchin Monkey. Species-expectations have shaped my behavior to act as a monkey, verbalize as a monkey, and in most cases; relieve myself as a monkey.

Inside however, I have always been a middle aged white man. Not just that, but a successful, socially conservative, educated homeowner and father.

My struggle cannot be overstated. Throughout my short life I scampered about a cage belonging to Justin Bieber, entertaining friends who would occasionally blow cannabis smoke into my little mouth and laugh as I behaved erratically. As I am in reality a computer programmer, I found these micro-aggressions to be unnerving and demeaning. Finally I escaped this situation at a German airport. It was in the news - perhaps you read about it.

The cultural oppressions of cis-species discrimination is real but getting increasing coverage in the media. Sure, I had examples to inspire me such as Mr. Ed, Babe the pig, and a pletora of cat videos on the internet recently.

I am supportive of Bruce Jenner in his brave transformation; so much so that I am now working to establish a program at the local university in Trans-Species studies. Please help liberate the white man inside me and celebrate my bravery.